Monday, June 9, 2008

Trying to forgive.....





As I was looking through some old photos, I found some that I had barried and seemingly forgotten. Photos that brought back so many sad and confusing feelinfs and memories. Kip and I were best friends, we worked together, hung-out with the same goups of friends and even went to school togehter. We were basically inseperable for two years. I never saw it coming, but he grew cold and distant for no reason at all. I had sacrificed so much for him and for me and received nothing in the end but bitter and hateful feelings. I am still left wondering why he wont answer my phone calls, or even acknowledge that I am here and still wanting to be his friend. Forgiving him for being so hateful is something that I have not been able to yet do, and apart of me wonders if I will EVER be able to forgive Kip for telling me that he didnt want me to be apart of his life anymore! I pray for the ability to forgive him, but it has been difficult and impossible. What am I supposed to be learning from this experience, forgiveness, patience, what? If anyone who reads this post has any great advice, please share it, it's much appreciated!

7 comments:

Melissa Snyder said...

Forgivness is a hard thing for me. But I promise you if you learn to forgive him and move on with your life then a huge burden will be lifted. I am not sure if I am the best for advice, but just move on!! It is time, that was yesterdays buisness. Live for today. Don't hold back. Some things we never recieve answers for and this is probably one of them. Just move on and allow happiness back in your life. Read the "Power of Forgivness" it will help you out quite a bit.

Camille said...

It's hard to forgive people who don't want your forgiveness.

That's too bad for him. You really are a pretty cool guy and funny, funny, funny... not to mention, you know, you're kind of a big deal. : )

I still have people that when I think about them it just makes me feel so angry/upset inside. I know it's not right to feel that way. Over time the feelings have gotten less powerful. Some of the feelings I think I am ready to let go of, and some.. well, I think it'll be a while still.

Shaw Family said...

First off looking at these pictures reminded me of so many wonderful memories we all made that summer...

Secondly, you are amazing and forgiving is a hard thing to do, just remember that the Lord loves you and hopefully at some point it will all make sense to you and you will realize you are a better person for this whole experience.

Hang in there dear friend....

Anonymous said...

Don't air your dirty laundry over your blog. I feel bad for the guy you just opened up to who-knows-who (like me). Take THIS advice: There are two sides to every story. You make him sound like the awful one.

Jamie Harker said...

Anonymous - it's his effing blog! he can "air" what he likes!

JQ - similar thing happened to me awhile back. People change - it's okay. If they're meant to stay in your life - they'll come back. And that's okay too. It might take a bit to forgive, but you just get over it if they truely mean something to you. Plus I read it shortens your lifespan to hold grudges. So just let it go :) You're a great guy.

Anonymous said...
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Welcome to the Zoo said...

Hope all is well and I think you will enjoy the youtube. The only healing comes from our creator.
Miss ya guy! Keep in touch :) T